


Caring

by TheEmcee



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Angst, Comfort, Complete, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-04
Updated: 2014-04-04
Packaged: 2018-01-18 02:57:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1412413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheEmcee/pseuds/TheEmcee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alfred never told Arthur about his recent depression or his economy crisis. Why would he when Arthur always seemed to not care or simply swept his feelings under the rug as though they never mattered? (Sucky summary and title are sucky).</p>
            </blockquote>





	Caring

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing.
> 
> A/N: I wanted to write a sad UkUs story, so I did. Let me know what you think! R&R. Enoy!

~…~  
Caring  
~…~

“I can’t believe that you could be so reckless!” Arthur all but yelled at Alfred. 

Currently, the younger nation was curled up underneath his blankets in his bedroom. His current…state of affairs had, of course, been broadcast to the entire world and everyone knew that the United States of America was suffering from what many called the Second Great Depression and the Financial Crisis. Truthfully, Alfred wasn’t sure how something like that could even happen. All he knew was that, one day, everything was fine and dandy and the next everything had gone to hell. Pure, unadulterated hell. That’s what he got for taking a break and distancing himself from his job and his people.

At the time, Alfred had thought that taking some time away from everything, from being a nation, would help him to clear his head, to think. Clearly, he had been wrong. Distancing himself and trying, and failing, to get things straightened out had, obviously, been a very, very bad idea. When he came back, after a few years of trying to work through some personal problems, everything had gotten worse and this was the result. 

And now, here was Arthur, yelling at him as though he was an idiot. 

Well, Alfred was an idiot. He could’ve told anyone that much. What was bothering him and making him remain quiet was the fact that Arthur was there, acting as though he gave a damn. That was truly bizarre. Arthur didn’t care. Not anymore, at least, and certainly not about him. He had proven as much over the years, during the Revolution, the Civil War, even in times of peace and plenty. If it didn’t somehow benefit him, Arthur wanted no part of it. 

So why was he here then?

“You bloody git! You ought to know better than to just go off and leave your people to fend for themselves! You’ve seen what that’s done to other nations,” Arthur barked at him harshly. Alfred just curled in on himself tighter.

He could take a lot. He could take a beating. He could take being yelled at and threatened. And he could take being ignored and hated. But what Alfred couldn’t take was someone pretending as though they genuinely cared about him. The other nations didn’t hide how they felt about him, and although what they felt towards him had always been less than savory, at least they had been honest.

Arthur had been like that. He never hid what he felt from anyone and he let anyone have it who deserved it. But he had never been a two face bastard, especially not the Alfred, who was, as the Brit had often said, the source of all of his problems. Now, though, as he paced back and forth before Alfred’s very eyes, he sounded and looked as though he was genuinely concerned about Alfred’s state of affairs.

It made Alfred feel like he was worth less than dirt.

Alfred had always prided honesty over deception and he welcomed whatever someone felt about him, even if it was bad. As long as they were honest, he was fine. He was honest himself and he respected that honest in return. Yet here was Arthur, giving him nothing but fake concern and pity, something that Alfred didn’t want or ask for. This wasn’t Arthur and this wasn’t what Alfred wanted to needed right now.

“Are you even listening to me? Probably not. You’re probably too worried about when you’ll eat your next burger or something like that,” Arthur ranted. “I swear, Alfred, you’re-“

“Arthur, just leave,” Alfred mumbled from under his blanket, pulling it tighter around his body.

“W-what?! How dare you! I come all the way here from home just to check on how you’re holding up and you just tell me to leave?!” Arthur shouted, looking like his usual angry self. “I know I raised you better than that!”

“Yeah, you did, Arthur, but I don’t need this right now,” Alfred said, not looking at Arthur, staring straight ahead.

“Need what right now? Need someone to put your head on straight? I believe that you do, my boy,” Arthur growled at him.

“No. What I don’t need is you acting like you care about what happens to me,” Alfred said, finally sitting up but keeping his gaze to the floor. 

“W-what?” Arthur asked, his voice cracking and faltering. Finally, at long last, Alfred looked at him.

“Let’s face it, Arthur: all I’ve ever been to you was a way to gain power and money. You never cared about me, not really, and you definitely don’t need me,” Alfred said, allowing the brutal honesty of what he was saying hit Arthur close to home. “Yeah, I’ve been an idiot and yeah, I’ve made some really bad choices, but what I don’t need now is someone pretending like they care about me.”

“Alfred…” Arthur said softly.

“I get it, Arthur. Really, I do. Hardly anyone likes me and they’ve all made that perfectly clear. But at least they’ve been honest about it,” Alfred said, still meeting Arthur’s emerald eyed gaze. “I guess it’d be hard to tell a former colony that you really don’t care, but just don’t act like you do. I’d rather you be honest with me about it than have you lie to my face.”

“Alfred, you…you really don’t believe that I feel that way about you, do you?” Arthur asked, sounding truly shocked and dumbfounded for once. 

“The Great Rapprochement,” Alfred said.

“That…” was all Arthur had time to say before Alfred cut him off. 

“The Alaska Purchase.”

“Now that wasn’t my fault…”

“The Olney-Pauncefote Treaty.”

“Alfred…” Arthur said softly.

“The Civil War,” Alfred said loudly, standing up and letting his blankets fall away from him. At that, Arthur cringed.

“I…I didn’t mean…”

“The Monroe Doctrine,” Alfred continued, his voice rising with every item he added to the list.

“The War of 1812.” By this point, Arthur had stopped trying to interrupt him and instead just stared at him with wide, green eyes that looked incredibly bright.

“The American Revolution!” Alfred shouted at him. Arthur flinched, actually flinched, as though he was being attacked. 

“For someone who seemed to care about me ever since I was a baby, you have a funny way of showing it!” Alfred yelled at him. “There for a while, I thought you hated me, that you didn’t give to shits about me! I still think that! And yet here you are…”

Alfred trailed off. Suddenly, he felt incredibly tired. And old. Older than he’d ever felt before. He sat down on the bed and sighed heavily. 

“I just…can’t take it when someone acts like they care, Arthur,” Alfred confessed. “I can handle anything but…I’m tired. I’m so tired of being jerked around by you and getting my hopes up that you care about me one day and yet ignore my calls the next. I don’t get it and I’m tired of trying to.” When he looked up, his eyes were filled with tears and they began to fall from his blue eyes.

“When I went away for a while, when I distanced myself from my job, my people, the rest of the world, it was because I was trying to sort out how to stop the hurt and the pain I’d always feel when you gave me the cold shoulder or acted like I was worth less than the scum on the bottom of your shoe,” Alfred said and sighed again. “It didn’t work out too well, I suppose. Because part of me still hopes that you do truly care even though I know you don’t.”

“Alfred…” Arthur said and the pain and sorrow in his voice made Alfred look up. 

And suddenly, the Brit’s fist was colliding with his face. Alfred fell to the floor, his cheek stinging from Arthur’s punch, and cried out in surprise. Holding his cheek, Alfred looked up at the older nation.

“What the hell, man?!” he yelled.

“You bloody wanker! Do you honestly think that I don’t care about you?” Arthur said. It was only then that Alfred realized that he, too, was crying. “You’re all I’ve cared about since I found you, you git! I think of you every single day and I want nothing more than to see you and be with you every single day. But I was afraid that you’d think I was going to try and conquer you again, so I kept my distance. Besides, things hadn’t been easy on me. You did break my heart, after all.”

“You broke mine first,” Alfred countered. “All I ever wanted was for you to notice me, be proud of me, and recognize me as your equal.”

“Oh, Alfred,” Arthur said as he sat down beside the younger nation. “I’ve always noticed you. You shine brighter than any sun or star. I’ve always been proud of you, even when you made me angry. And you’ve been my equal for so many, many years now. How can I not see you as my equal?”

Arthur wrapped his arms around Alfred’s shaking body and pulled him in close. It was as though as dam had broken; all of Alfred’s pains and fears and sorrows came rushing out along with his years as he held onto Arthur for dear life. 

“You’ve been my whole world since the day you chose me, Alfred. And nothing is ever going to change that,” Arthur said, pressing a kiss to Alfred’s head. “I may be weak and reluctant to share my feelings as often as I’d like publically, but I’ve always cared about you. Never, ever doubt that for a minute, okay?”

“Okay,” Alfred rasped after a minute of hiccupping and sobbing. God, he felt like a child, but with Arthur’s hands rubbing his back and his lips pressing kisses to his hair, that was okay. 

“Good. Now, let’s get you cleaned up, shall we?” Arthur suggested. “Your emotions are probably all over the place and in a right state. Any kind of relaxation is probably welcome, eh?”

“Yeah,” Alfred mumbled, feeling dazed and out of sorts. 

Actually, he felt a lot better than he did before. Yes, he was still going through a depression and a financial crisis, but now that he knew that Arthur would be there for him no matter what, Alfred knew that he could face anything. It may take him a while to bounce back, but he would. With Arthur beside him, he would.


End file.
